Actual relationships drive actual referrals


Everyone knows that lawyer. You realize the one. The lawyer who has constructed their total apply on the again of a handful of referrals. It seems straightforward once they do it, actual “no large deal” kind of stuff. But when it really is that straightforward—how is that lawyer so good at it if you don’t even know the place to start out?

Absolutely there’s magic at play. That lawyer is the last word charmer who serendipitously occurs to be in the best place on the proper time—each time.

Regardless of the secret, you must determine it out as a result of referrals drive regulation agency enterprise. And whereas referrals could really feel like random acts of magic or serendipity which can be past your management, they aren’t. They’re the end result of one thing way more human and down-to-earth: actual, genuine relationships which can be nurtured by intentionality and planning.

Actual relationships

When individuals ask me what I do, I inform them, “I assist attorneys make associates.” If I’m feeling particularly cheeky, I’ll observe it up with, “and remind them the right way to be human.” Joking apart, it by no means ceases to amaze me how attorneys constantly deal with skilled relationships as alien in contrast with private connections.

The way you develop your friendships is an effective mannequin for growing genuine referral relationships. Constructing a reference to somebody professionally doesn’t differ an excessive amount of from connecting with them personally.

I’m not right here to persuade you to be somebody you aren’t, to do stuff you hate, or to push you to spend a lopsided period of time on nonbillables. I’m right here to supply a reframing and some easy methods you’ll be able to construct or leverage the sorts of relationships that quietly energy a apply. You, too, might be that lawyer—with a little bit of intentionality and planning.

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What referrals truly replicate

Referrals are an indication of belief. A referral is an invite. It says: “I belief this individual that can assist you.” Belief will not be inbuilt a single second. It comes from constantly exhibiting up in a approach that’s genuine to who you might be and gives worth (not simply asking for enterprise).

Your elevator pitch, LinkedIn posts, thought management and occasion attendance all play a job—they elevate your visibility. It’s straightforward to confuse visibility with worth. Visibility alone doesn’t earn belief, however it’s going to make you memorable.

Individuals refer individuals they like, belief and keep in mind. Take into consideration the final time you referred a stylist, a house contractor, a plumber. You probably did it since you had vetted their work and trusted they would offer your pal with high quality service. You don’t wish to be on the hook for a foul haircut, do you?

The low-effort path to staying prime of thoughts

So how do you turn out to be that lawyer? You don’t must overhaul your calendar or begin internet hosting breakfast roundtables. What you do want is intentionality and planning. (There’s a theme, people.)

Listed below are just a few methods to construct and keep trust-based relationships with out turning your life the other way up.

1. Choose 5 and attain out

You don’t must community with 500 individuals. It is advisable keep linked with 5 to 10 individuals who you’re keen to spend money on and who genuinely know what you’re about.

Make a brief listing: former colleagues, classmates, co-counsel, a previous shopper you actually preferred. Then make a behavior of reaching out. Not with a pitch, however with one thing that reveals you might be invested and care; bonus factors when you hit one in every of their ardour tasks.

  • Want them a cheerful birthday or work anniversary. A accomplice I labored a decade in the past makes pleased birthday calls to his community. I sit up for it yearly, and he’s the man I like to recommend when a chance in his area is talked about.
  • Inquire about their household trip or milestones.
  • Ship an article or e book advice that makes you consider them, and clarify why.
  • Congratulate them on an expert win or their favourite sports activities workforce’s win. After years of making an attempt to attach with a rainmaker at a agency, I lastly broke by once I emailed him after Vanderbilt’s upset over Alabama within the 2024 school soccer season.
  • Join over the most recent podcast or TV present. I do know a accomplice at a big regulation agency who generated a shopper relationship with a Fortune 500 firm over a shared ardour for Bravo actuality reveals.

These are human moments that supply connection and hold you memorable. It’s not any totally different than what you’d do with your folks, proper?

2. Be curious, not spectacular

You’ll be able to’t study somebody when you do all of the speaking. At your subsequent networking occasion or convention, strive to not discuss your self except somebody asks. Deal with asking individuals questions and being genuinely all in favour of their responses. Strive to attract them out by asking open-ended questions, like:

  • What’s holding you busy proper now?
  • What sort of work’s been most attention-grabbing currently?
  • What do you want individuals understood higher about your shoppers?
  • Past the skilled: What reveals/books/podcasts are you watching/studying/listening to? What enjoyable plans do you’ve developing?

Curiosity alerts humility, connection and confidence—all of which construct belief. Plus, individuals keep in mind the way you made them really feel. For those who make them really feel heard, they’ll keep in mind you.

3. Use what you’re already doing

You converse to people every single day. You’re emailing former shoppers, collaborating with opposing counsel, chatting with somebody after a CLE.

Flip a few of these interactions into one thing simply barely extra intentional.

  • As an alternative of closing with “Let me know when you ever want something,” say “It was nice to reconnect. Let’s not wait one other 12 months. I’ve some availability within the coming months. Do any of the next dates/instances give you the results you want? [Enter dates/times]”
  • After a pleasing interplay with one other lawyer, join on LinkedIn and ship a brief message on the platform or through e mail: “I actually appreciated the way you dealt with [X]. I’d like to remain in contact.”

You don’t want an excessively sophisticated technique, just a bit extra follow-through.

What to do that week

Keep in mind that skilled and private relationships are comparable. Sure, you’re a lawyer, however you might be additionally a human seeking to make skilled associates. Present up constantly, be real and intentional.

Right here’s a three-step problem to do this week:

  1. Make your listing. Who’re 5 individuals you’d like to get a referral from or wish to know higher?

  2. Attain out to 1. A fast e mail, a notice on LinkedIn, or a “This made me consider you” article.

  3. Comply with up deliberately. Calendar a fast check-in for 2 to a few months from now. (Bonus: Add a notice about their canine, trip or newest win.)

Closing thought

One of the best enterprise improvement technique is to be the form of individual individuals wish to work with. Your job is to remind them, gently and authentically, that you just’re nonetheless right here.

As a result of referrals don’t begin with the ask. They begin with the connection. And actual relationships are price your time.


Stacey McReynolds is chief advertising officer at Fractional Legislation Agency CMO, the place she helps attorneys and regulation companies sharpen technique, strengthen shopper relationships and develop their practices. With almost 20 years of expertise in enterprise improvement and advertising for companies from Am Legislation 20 to boutiques, she is understood for turning concepts into motion. Her expertise spans apply group technique, shopper groups and lateral accomplice integration. Beforehand, McReynolds had positions at Clyde & Co, Jones Day and Fisher Phillips.


Thoughts Your Enterprise is a collection of columns written by attorneys, authorized professionals and others throughout the authorized business. The aim of those columns is to supply sensible steerage for attorneys on the right way to run their practices, present details about the most recent tendencies in authorized expertise and the way it may also help attorneys work extra effectively, and techniques for constructing a thriving enterprise.


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